Whose expectaions are you living up to?

July 20, 2010 at 6:07 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine. ~ Bruce Lee

Here’s the thing girls- You often get this idea that you have to live up to someone else’s expectations. You get expectations from so many angles. Lets start right at home. Of course your parents will have expectations of you. And I have to say, no matter what, generally they do have your best interest at heart. But you need to be sure that what they expect of you is reasonable and what you want.

Now what do I mean by reasonable? Is it something that with a reach and stretch you can achieve? Or is it really and truly to high? On the other hand, it could be that their expectations are too low for you. You know you can reach way beyond what they are expecting of you.

At this critical time in your life you begin to shift away from living the expectations of your parents to living up to your own expectations. And this shift is full of anxiety, new ways of thinking, and possible failure. That’s why its so critical for you to be able to really understand what you want, why you want it, and be able to live to your own expectations.

You see to be able to live up to your expectations you really do need to have expectations. And they need to be authentically yours. Expectations, goals, and to do lists have some subtle yet significant differences.

Lets start with to do lists- in a sense these are expectations- they are what you expect to do that day/week. But the difference is that to do lists are simply actions. They do not have emotional attachment to them. They are a lost of results. No emotions and no pathway to achieve these results.

Goals are much closer to expectations. Goals are things you want to achieve, things that, generally with effort, you desire to accomplish. As you can see, goals do have emotions. The thing about goals is that they are the product, the end result. That’s why so often goals are so frustrating. Because without the means, the path, the process to the goal its often impossible to get to the goal.

So what are expectations? How do they differ from these other two? An expectation is a confident belief or strong hope that a particular event will happen. You have a mental image of something expected, often compared to its reality. With an expectation you have a standard of conduct or performance expected by or of somebody. And the somebody I want to have the expectation of you is you.

Expectations are entirely different from to do lists- plenty of emotion with expectations. And even though goals have emotions, they are not as comprehensive as expectations. Expectations not only include the result with emotion, they include the mental path to get there.

It’s you who matters the most. If you are living up to your parents’ expectations, you will never be truly satisfied. You will always have a hole in your feeling of success and achievement. And this is entirely different from when you were a kid. Now as an emerging/young adult for the first time in your life you can have your own expectations and live up to them.

These expectations are in your sports of course, but they are in every aspect of your life- from who you hang with, to how well you do in school, to what kind of make up you wear (or don’t wear). You can and do have expectations in everything you do.

Keep track of your expectations- in a journal, on note cards, in a word doc. – And pay attention to the expectations of your parents. Do you want these expectations to be your own? Can you have ownership of them? If not find your own expectations. Whittle what’s been handed to you till it bears your personal mark. Have excitement and pride in and about your expectations.

Remember it’s only you who can live up to your expectation-so give them your all and go to it girl!

Grace Running For Girls June Update.

July 1, 2010 at 11:38 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments
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Grace Running For Girls
June Update.

Hey thanks so much for your support while I get ready to run the NY marathon representing the Women’s Sports Foundation (http://WomensSportsFoundation.org). It’s really great to get back from a run and see people have sent me messages of encouragement- via email, twitter, and facebook-

All I can say is it was WAY easier to run when I was in my 20’s than now at 51. I suppose it might have something to do with age, but more it has to do with having backed off for so many years, and the accident that caused And then I just had school and running and, of course, my social life. Now I have LIFE and REPSONSIBILITIES.

Anyway here in June I met two of my four goals:

• Goal 1- to run 100 miles in June- Yahoo I actually ran 113.5 and it wasn’t even hard except two days. My first nine mile run I really dragged in for the last mile. But my next two nine mile runs were actually pretty easy and fun. It’s really incredible how my muscles are able to remember what to do!

• Goal 2-to have $500 in pledges and donations- Again I have surpassed my goal- I have $385 in donations and $550 in pledges totaling $945. THANKS to all of you who have joined in this. I know that the girls and women who will get to have physical activity added to their lives will be forever grateful. We all know how our own lives are enhanced by being able to get out and move!

• Goal 3-to run a 12 mile run- Well I just missed this by 1.5 miles. I really think I could have done it! BUT I miss calculated the mileage- bummer! And that was yesterday so no going back to June. Of course today I need to take it easy and recover- but really and truly I do feel mostly great ☺ My right calf is pretty tight- slept with a heating pad on it. But my back is incredibly well- (THANK YOU Todd Mosenthal and Anita Furbush for your great work on healing me!)

• Goal 4- to reach 500 people and have 100 support/sponsor me. I reached 230 people via email, twitter, and facebook and I’ve gotten support from around 50 people in both cheering me on and sponsors. So still not up to my goal, but not so far from the mark.

You know it’s really great to be out doing something from my heart! I know I toot this message in my blogs, with my clients, and especially with my friends and family. And for the most part I have lived my life from my heart. But it was all about the “for my family” and this is for those who have so much less than I can ever imagine. It’s really rather easy to live from your heart when you have everything you could ever need or want right there in front of you.

Hey if you aren’t inclined to sponsor me, I’d still really love your support in cheering me on- Best way to connect is on facebook http://facebook.com/grace.mauzy

And if you want to sponsor me/learn more here’s the link to do it:
http://www.whitemountainweb.com/Grace2010.html
(THANKS to Donna Gilberto for putting this up)

Have an awesome day filled with passion, purpose, prosperity, and integrity,
Grace

PS Please feel free to pass this on to five of your friends.

Grace Mauzy, MA
Leadership and Success for Young Female Athletes
http://tinyurl.com/leadership-successyYFA

To Be Successful Sometimes You Need to Pretend

June 14, 2010 at 5:40 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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Today’s quote-
“To be a great champion you must believe you are the best. If you’re not, pretend you are.”

Muhammad Ali

It’s so important to understand that being the best HAS to come form your heart, your being, your soul. When you decide that you are going to be an athlete there is some part of you that wants to be the champion. You want to be successful with your strengths, your abilities, your raw talent, and your enthusiasm. You are the one who must believe this. If it’s only your parents, your coaches, your friends then you will be good, but not great. Good is always the antithesis of great. (That means if you go for good you won’t get to great.)

It’s sometimes hard to make this transition and believe in yourself this much!

You may get some kind of gnawing inside your gut you, some voice saying you’re kidding, or you may get a sore muscle or even a school assignment that gets in the way of your progress.

You are the only one who can get past these obstacles. This is where pretending can actually help. Remember when you were a little kid and you pretended? You KNEW in your heart that this pretending was real.

Well, this kind of pretending now will bring things to reality. I don’t mean just pretend with your mind. When you were a kid you didn’t just dream your pretend moments. You dressed, talked, walked, LIVED these pretend games.

That’s what you must do on your days when you are not sure of yourself- Pretend you are amazing, successful. Be your own leader. Does the champion on an off day sit around eating junk? Moping? Wishing to be better? Absolutely NOT!

The champion gets up and does the workout, the meditation, the HARD HARD work that is necessary to get to the top. That’s what you must do.

When you are unsure of yourself you need to step into the land of make believe. Pretend you are THE champion. Do everything, live everything, be everything it takes to be a champion.

Yesterday was on FULL day of training!

June 10, 2010 at 6:10 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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Well yesterday was one full day of training.
I took my second six mile run- at about 11 minute miles.
What a dif from when I was young!
Then I could do 6 miles in 36 minutes no problem.-
That’s six minute miles.

I took my puppy (she’s a year now).
When we got back I took off her leash. She ran around in crazy circles
like we hadn’t ever been out at all.

But back to the training-after the run I had a Zumba class-
(great way to loosen up my hips, and back)
that was followed by Pilates-
core strength in any sport is so essential!

Anyway I had a great run, time to contemplate the auspicious idea that I
am going to run the NY Marathon at 51, just four years after a serious accident,
and that I am going to encourage you and others to contribute to my fund raising efforts
for The Women’s Sports Foundation.

Now why would I want to support The Woman’s Sports Foundation so much?
First of all, without them Title IX would have much less impact. It might have been
set up as a law, but without their lobbying and granting organizations to support
Women’s Sport not nearly as much progress would have been made.

SO why now? Aren’t girls sports doing just fine? Aren’t there plenty of programs for girls in sports?
Yes and no- yes tons of programs exist, and they all cost money- far more than we as parents actually pay.
But even more than the existing programs there are still too many girls who do not get involved with sports or being physically active.
Why is this important?
Simple- Sports and being physically active have been proven in plenty of studies to be PREVENTATIVE of all kinds issues and problems for people of all ages- especially adolescent girls.

And its still girls and women who are far less likely to be physically active than boys and men. The Women’s Sports Foundation encourages and supports all ages and abilities of girls and women to become more active.

By supporting me you are actually helping to decrease our national expenses by bringing the health of girls and women to a higher level.

Love to have you donate right now-
http://active.com/donate/wsf/gracerunning

Can you risk a little love for a nurd?

June 9, 2010 at 10:44 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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This morning I had a chat w/ a friend in India. The gist was-
Here we are across the world living and loving while
people who are physically in the same neighborhood, office,
even home spend their time arguing, fighting, and hating.

Its a great day to share a bit of love- make the world a brighter place.
As a young female athlete you really have a lot of influence on others.
YOu can be the leader who shuns the nurdy outcast even more, or you can
figure out how to accept this weirdo kid, for their own worth.

This doesn’t mean to go out and invite this kid to your home, start be totally in with this kid.
It means be silent when others ridicule, harm, or hurt this kid.
It means maybe say leave this kid alone.
It means say one acceptable thing about this kid.

You are a leader for your friends. You have the success of being an athlete-
This is a real privilege. It took great energy and sacrifice for you to get
to where you are. And tons of fun and excitement too.

With gratitude give a bit of love (maybe only in your own head- I mean not so any one else even knows you’ve done this but you) to the kid who just didn’t get born with the knack to be cool and awesome like you.

Ever done anything like this? lets hear about it- if you are up for the risk

http://active.com/donate/wsf/gracerunning

What kind of criticism do you get as a mom of a young female athlete?

June 2, 2010 at 4:46 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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Being the mom of very high level, talented, dedicated young female athletes certainly has it up moments. You know when they get trophies, get up on the podium, and are having a great training day.

But then there are the days that as a mom it’s really hard. Last week I had to take Jamie off to Lake Placid for five months of training. Now we will get to see her. Its not like she is just plain gone for all those months. But the time we spend together will be short and sporadic. And I’m just not ready for that.

I’m still thinking about how we can do this kind of cross training, how we can do this special day together, how we can do this art project, and the list goes on. I still think of the fun we had when she was little. And how we’d go off to the park where she would climb up on top of the swing set and walk along. The mothers were totally frantic and sure she would kill herself. I think some thought I was insane and others thought I was beyond insane.

To get to this wonderful point where she is out there and up there and just one amazing athlete I had to live with LOTS of criticism. But let me tell you it sure was worth it!

What kind of criticism have you had to put up with being a mom of a young female athlete on her way to success and leadership?

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