Wisdom Wednesday: Spring Sports and Good Moral

April 30, 2008 at 6:21 am | Posted in 1, children, dads, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, moms, Mothers, parents, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, sports, teens, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | 2 Comments
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Spring Sports and Moral

Sports are such a major part of our lives these days. Parents sign kids up months in advance. They take them to tryouts at younger and younger ages. The practices are anywhere from twice a week to every afternoon. And the competitions take at least one weekend day, with tournaments taking both days. Why in the world do we have our kids “free” time filled with sports? What is the draw? And the bottom line, is it healthy for our children’s self esteem? If it is not healthy, what do we do?

Human beings are by nature group-oriented. We live in societies. We engage in interactions with others. Human beings, also by nature, relish in being challenged, and part of all the stress we create for ourselves comes from this need of ours. Finally, children love to be active and physical and voila, sports for children seem to fit the bill perfectly.

However, why do we have sports for children when thirty years ago, sports played by children was predominantly part of school or ad-hoc empty field games? Why do we have tryouts for young children and organized sports now?

This change comes from some whole culture changes. In the past (50+ years), most children actually had lots of necessary physical activities. Walking was the main mode of transportation. Children would easily walk four to ten miles a day, just getting around without cars. Life was obviously structured without all the conveniences we have, thus physical activity just existed. There was no need to implant it in our lives.

The other major cultural change is electronic entertainment. Again in the past, children had to create their own entertainment. This was often a challenge. It took mental strength and ability. The most popular kids were not the ones with the gadgets, but the ones who had the best imaginations. You can still find these kids, but our media has taught us to look for gadget owners as being the ones to follow.

Our children now need to be entertained rather than create their own challenges. With these two major changes in our society, a huge hole was left for kids. They do not have enough physical activity and they look to be entertained rather than create and challenge themselves. These two cultural changes and our innate human tendencies to need physical activity and challenges makes children’s sports the perfect answer to accommodate our needs.

Given the perfect situation: parents, coaches, teammates, and child all filling roles with enthusiasm, respect, enough challenge, physical activity, freedom to create and play outside the actual regulated sport, then you will have a wonderful time with sports for your children. But perfection is not always the case and as children get older parts of the picture get skewed. That is when sports can and does diminish moral and self-esteem.

So what are your choices? Pull your kid out? Stick it out? Find another team? Make changes where you are? All of these have merit, except stick it out. To make changes first look to yourself. Ask yourself these questions: How am I contributing to the negative aspects of this sport? Check that you communicate respect, enthusiasm, and appropriate disappointment. Be sure to express yourself as your child’s advocate. Your next place to look is how the coach handles the team. If the coach is constantly belittling the players, having too many drills, treating young children as if they were teenagers, forcing players to feel guilty, then you need to talk with the coach. Rather than tell the coach how to be different, find an article, suggest a speaker for the team/parents/coaches. In other words don’t attack the coach. If you are unable to get any change with the coach find another team. If what is happening to your child is seriously detrimental, then pull your kid out right now.

When the parents as a whole are overly aggressive and demanding perfection from their kids, again get some articles that give new ideas, or get a speaker to come. Try not to challenge or attack these parents. Generally if you do, they will shut down to change. As the parent you have both the responsibility and the privilege to help your child grow into the most illuminating gem. Sports can and does bring out wonderful parts of our children. Use that side of sports to guide you in your path of youth sports.

Grace E. Mauzy, M.A.
Founder of GEM Parenting
http://www.GEMParenting.com
Copyright © 2008 ♥ GEM Parenting ♥ http://www.GEMParenting.com

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Motivational Monday: Spring Sports

April 27, 2008 at 11:43 pm | Posted in children, Creative Crayon Club, dads, Families, Family Time, Focused Fridays, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, moms, Mothers, Motivational Monday, parents, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, sports, teens, Thoughtful Thursday, toddlers, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | 1 Comment
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It is great that you are here for Motivational Monday.

These days it is quite common for our children to be involved in sports-at least one a season.  And let me tell you, there are wonderful aspects of sports.  But there are also parts of these organized sports that simply cause despair and low self-esteem.  That is the side of spring sports we are going to deal with.  Right now while you are in the thick of it.

One tip for today:  If your child is feeling inadequate because of other teammates, tell a story of yourself or a grandparent who had a similar experience.  The purpose of the story is to let your child know you understand what they are going through and you are here to help.  We’ll be talking about how to help and what to avoid.  We want sports to be fun, challenging, invigorating, and self-esteem building.

Join us this week for GEM Parenting Secrets to help the rest of the season be a positive and uplifting experience for your child.

                               

Tickle Me Tuesday

Come back to see what other experts have to say about keeping moral high when doing sports.

Wisdom Wednesday

I have four children who are avid sports enthusiasts.  I am the epitome of the sports mom.  My car is a locker room, we have cleats in every size available, snacks are always needed for energy, and my weekends and afternoons are spent running to and from practices and games.  In all of this I have kept a clear vision that sports are fun, challenging, invigorating, and self-esteem building.  I am going to share both personal and professional ideas to help you have good moral from sports in my article.  If you are having trouble with sports now, come back to read the article!

GEM Parenting Secrets this Wednesday

Is at 8:30 eastern, 5:30 pacific

This week’s title is Sports and Good Moral

I will be discussing how sports can and does have tremendous effect on your child’s self-esteem.  We will look at strategies that will alleviate stress and bring the fun back to the sport.  How to have sports increase your child’s self esteem rather than leave your child torn and tattered after every game and practice.

For only $6 you can join this teleseminar and find out the best ways to decrease the negative impact of sports on your children, help them feel satisfied and desire to have fun, be challenged and increase their self-esteem through sports. Have your children learn from sports how to take a difficult situation and turn it into a positive growing experience.  Give both you and your children the courage and peace that comes with doing a job well done.  And best of all you give your family the opportunity to develop high self-esteem and bring out the beautiful Gem that is within each member of your family.

As a registered participant you will have the opportunity to ask your personal questions.  Send them in advance of the teleseminar.  You will benefit you family’s self esteem, increase the joys of being n sports, and decrease the stress involved with having kids who love sports but are being crushed by them.

                        

Thoughtful Thursday

The podcast of Sports and Good Moral becomes available.  This is an audio recording of the teleseminar.  You can purchase the recording if you can’t attend the teleseminar.  The recording can be downloaded to your computer or favorite mp3 player.  This way you can listen to the recording at any time you want.

Sneak Preview for Next Week:  Tame the Teenager- I am the guest expert.

My topic will be Teenage Good Behavior Through High Self-Esteem

Send in your questions, today, so I can be sure to address your personal concerns grace@gemparenting.com

Friendly Friday

I call this Friendly Friday because this is the day that I answer questions you have sent in.  So if you have a question I can only answer it if you send it in.  I would urge you to send in the question right now to grace@gemparenting.com.

Creative Crayon Club                                         

Saturday we have fun activities so you and your family can kick back and relax.  These activities will bring peace and harmony to your home and help increase your family’s self-esteem.

We will also share products and programs that coincide with Spring Sports and Good Moral

Hope you have a great week and we at GEM Parenting can assist you in your journey to parent with passion, purpose, and integrity.  Remember we believe at GEM Parenting, every child is a GEM

Enjoy your week!

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