Is It Tomorrow Yet?

October 7, 2009 at 8:33 pm | Posted in attitudes | Leave a comment
Tags: , , , ,

Here it is late at night for me.  Not so late for some of my kids.  I remember that days when I had all my kids in bed by 8:00.  And I would be sleeping by 8:30.  Oh how I loved those days.  And we would all be up in the morning singing, happy and playing.  But now I have one child left who on her own- well almost on her own- gets up in the morning.

The other daughter at home is a SSSLLLLOOOOWWWW riser.  And with home schooling, she often forgets about the necessity of getting up.  So every now and then I spend the day letting her know and understand the privileges she gets.

Today was one of those days.  When she strolled downstairs at 9:00,  when she had her breakfast at 9:30, when she did her math test in pajamas, when she got to go for a bike ride after lunch, and now that she has just gotten home from dance she does not have to stay up for the next two hours to get her homework done.

These are her privileges for now.  And what do I get out of her being home schooled?

Sometimes it’s as easy as pie to understand.  You see I am just like you.  I have all kinds of stuff to do.  Busy stuff that really doesn’t mean too bits of anything if I get it done or not.  Only somehow it SEEMS like if I don’t get it done I, or one of my kids, will just fall all apart.

And so with home schooling I have this time when we are not actually crazy with that stuff.  But really the thing is that no matter how you raise your kids.  You get consumed with all the stuff.

So here’s what I am doing- writing you- and then I will go up and read to my kids, know that whatever is on my list that did not get done again today will still be on my list tomorrow and the next tomorrow and the next.

Because tomorrow I get to start again, but it will never be today again.  You know that old cliche- Only it is true.  You just do what you can today.  Be thankful you have your kids and know that one day you won’t have them. You better really know that because no matter what you do, they will be gone.  And anything else would be too sad to think about.

Night all. Sleep well- I am sure I will now that I have shared this with you.

Advertisements

Add Your Values to Your Parenting

June 8, 2009 at 9:26 am | Posted in 1 | Leave a comment
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Last I wrote to you about character.
This week I’m all excited to talk about value.

“We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence,
but we rather have those because we have acted rightly.”
Aristotle

This is such an important concept.
As a parent it is not that you
have to know the “right” way to
behave in your head.

It is that you have to act and behave the
“right” way.

Sounds simple, but with all the pressure and
influence around us to live with out
our personal values we often loose
touch with them.

What are your values?
How are you living up to and with them?

If you are falling short in most of your
values then try this.

Pick just one value that you will absolutely adhere to
for one day.
Make no exceptions.
Be strong and firm.

Give your whole self to this value.
And see that you pick a value that you
are certain is from your heart.

When you live with your values
you let your children know
that what comes from your heart
is more important than how others
react to you.

Thus the get to have natural high self esteem.

Grace

****************************************************

Summer program:

What:     How to Parent with Passion, Purpose, and Integrity.
Weekly Tele-support workshop

When:     Four Thursdays in July
July 2, 9, 16, 30

Time:    LIVE
10:30-12:00 am EDT
9:30-11:00 am CDT
7:30-9:00 am PDT
Recording whenever you want

Where: On your phone anywhere
Recording on your computer

Cost:    $12/week if registered for all four sessions by June 18. Total $48
$19/week after that. Total $76

Why:    Making a change from how you were brought up
Leery of mass media
Wanting to use positive intervention
Feeling inadequate as a mom

Topics:    1: How to be a mom whom I respect?
with all the pressures that surround me?
There are the social norms,
the media that hits,
family pressures,
husband who is put off by the out of the box parenting
but going along with it- for now at least.

2: How can I support my kids in their achievements?
but not become the pushy parent with the needs?
Is there any real way to be a supportive parent
and not get too involved?

3: How can I maintain my sanity?
when there is all this energy change?
I have no idea of what is best for my family or me?
How can I make any good decision when
there is just way too much to choose from?

4: Is there any escape from this totally
overwhelming stress inducing thing
called “Good Parenting”??????

Register here:
http://tinyurl.com/JULY09-PPI

As a Pearl Member the price today is
$10/week- total $40.

That’s affordable for you.
You can really do this.

Sign up right now!
Don’t waiver or it
will be just like everything else you do.

I look forward to “seeing” you in July.
**********************************************

For today stick to your values.
And parent with passion, purpose, and integrity,

Grace

How to Build Character

June 1, 2009 at 9:47 am | Posted in 1 | 1 Comment
Tags: , , , , , ,

Motivational Monday

************************************************************

If you find this blog entry interesting and helpful please
pass it along to your friends.

Again thanks to those who emailed/blogged  me
with your concerns and issues.

It’s still important to email your concerns-
You are here at GEM Parenting because
need help with your parenting.
You want to understand and develop
your parenting, reduce your stress and
overwhelm, and let your kids grow up
with natural high self-esteem.

And you certainly don’t want the national hazard
of having a brat for a kid.

And for some reason that just isn’t so simple.

Send in your concerns and issues.
Get your guidance.
And help others who are suffering with your issue,
but not quite ready to share.

I will send you a personal response and
for those who are willing to share even more,
I will put our Q & A on the blog-

Of course with your personal stuff removed.

*********************************************************
It’s my favorite day of the week.
Motivational Monday.

I love this day because it is the day that I
Get to start new things.
rejuvinated from the hectic weekend.
and get back into  my “regular” rhythm.

This week I want to talk about character.
To start here is a quote.

“Watch your thoughts;
they become words.
Watch your words;
they become actions.
Watch your actions;
they become habits.
Watch your habits;
they become character.
Watch your character;
it becomes your destiny.”

~ Frank Outlaw ~

This process is a vital part of being a
parent who uses positive intervention
and strives to raise children with
high self-esteem.

It’s also a way of understanding
what law of attraction is about in simple terms.

I am a person who believes in
what goes around comes around

And this how you can see it’s growth and progress.

Your character and the character
You develop in your children
starts with your thoughts.

Now this is not to say you have complete
control of your children’s character.
That would be impossible.

You don’t even have complete control of your own.

But you do have the ability to have control
of your thoughts.

This week I want you to be very aware of your thoughts.
Find what is negative, detrimental, excessive,
hurting, etc.
and change it to it’s opposite.

This is not the week to stop the thoughts.
This is the week to start
to build your own character.
And with it the character of your children.

Now another super important thing-
Be gentle and fun with this.

When you do catch yourself smile, take a relaxing breath
then and only then when you are
OK with yourself can you really
replace that negative thought.

Have a terrific week.

And for me,
be a parent with passion, purpose, and integrity,

Grace

Reduce Daily Overwhelm w/ Memorial Day Intervention

May 25, 2009 at 7:09 am | Posted in 1 | Leave a comment
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Happy Memorial Day
And Motivational Monday

************************************************************

If you find this interesting and helpful please
pass it along to your friends.

Again thanks to those who emailed me
with your concerns and issues.
grace@gemparenting.com
It’s still important to email your concerns-
You joined GEM Parenting because
need help with your parenting.
You want to understand and develop
your parenting, reduce your stress and
overwhelm, and let your kids grow up
with natural high self-esteem.

And you certainly don’t want the national hazard
of having a brat for a kid.

And for some reason that just isn’t so simple.

Send in your concerns and issues.
Get your guidance.
And help others who are suffering with your issue,
but not quite ready to share.

I will send you a personal response and
for those who are willing to share even more,
I will put our Q & A on the blog-

Of course with your personal stuff removed.

*********************************************************

Today is Memorial Day here in the USA.

What does that mean to you?
Why is it so important?
And what can you do today, this week to enhance
this day for your children?

I think one thing that we do for Memorial Day is to
think this is the beginning of summer,
a day off work, a day to have fun and relax.

Why is it important to have this kind of day?
Rather simple: we have the right to pursue happiness.

Yes, this simple idea, just a few hundred years ago
was unheard of.  Only a very small portion of
the population was even allowed to “think”
this way. And here we are: Knowing that
this is our right.

With this right has come better living standards, better health,
better education, better roads and transportation,
better communication, even better religion.

And more and more toys than we can imagine.
That’s the catch that is not part of our constitution:
There is responsibility that comes with the pursuit
of happiness.

Some say we have gone overboard with our pursuit of happiness.
And yes we sort of have.

For you as a parent here is how you can keep
Memorial Day present and reduce your
own stress at the same time.

Take time to think about “How will this purchase,
this program for my kids, this pursuit of happiness
actually help in my pursuit of happiness?”

This simple tactic can help you make decisions
with a criteria for your family.  You will reduce your
overwhelm.  Give it a try and let me know
what happens.

Today take a moment to remember and thank
those who thought you deserved your
party, boat, TV, cars, house, bar-b-que,
clothes, travel, pets, makeup, books,
ipods, computers, phones, comfy sofas,

Many risked their lives so you can pursue your happiness.
Happy Memorial Day

********************************************************
On My Home Front

(By the way- Any better ideas of a name for this section?)

This past week I took my 16-year-old daughter to Lake Placid
for training in aerials skiing.
On Tuesday evening we went to our last yoga class together for five months.
I silently cried through most of the class.  On the way home
that daughter lashed out at her youngest sister , then me.
Totally uncharacteristic of her.

I knew what was happening.  It was so hard for her to leave us,
even though following her dream and talent is so special,
that by getting mad at us would make it easier to leave.

I told her that.

When we got in the house
she broke down and sobbed.  We had
a family sob fest for a while.

When we got up to leave on Wed we were
all much better.

She is there, loving her training, and we will see her
at the end of June.

And I do miss her terribly.

On the other hand I am in the midst of giving my 12 turning 13
her birthday party.

It’s a 24 hr sleepover- with 18 kids to start- 3 went home before the sleepover.
Activites:
Lunch
Tie dyed tank tops,
Relay races
Snack
Tank top signature pass
Swim at town pool
Dinner
Man hunt- kind of flashlight tag
Asleep by 11:30

I am up with the birds.
The kids are asleep.
But when they get up
Birthday Breakfast-
Waffles, vanilla ice cream, crushed fresh strawberries and whipped cream-
My mouth is watering just writing this to you.

We have no real activity this morning
other than that.

They leave at 12:00.

Great to chat.
Love to hear what is going on at your house.

Time for me to crush strawberries and you to
Parent with passion, purpose and integrity,

Grace

PS:  On Wednesday check here for:
How to Use Positive Intervention With a Lying 13-Year-Old.

how to parent positively

May 5, 2009 at 2:58 pm | Posted in 1 | 1 Comment
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

The Power of Positive Energy –. Your attitude and perspective deeply affect how you present yourself to the world. A famous quote by Emerson reads: Enthusiasm is one of the most powerful engines of success. When you do a thing, do it with all your might. Put your whole soul into it. Stamp it with your own personality. Be active, be energetic, be enthusiastic and faithful, and you will accomplish your objective. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm. Learn that what you get back in life has a direct correlation with what you give. This is so important for parents. We are the ones who have to do the worst part of raising a kid. We have to get them to grow up right. Now that takes about everything we can think of and then some. And we, the parents, are the ones who have to nag and complain, pay attention to the crap on the floor, notice the dirty clothes heaped up waist high even though we vowed to never pay attention to the mess and smell again. Yep we are filled with the negative side of the whole thing. But we have an escape we can use our own positive energy to change what we see and what we attend to. With Law of Attraction what attend to brings it more energy. But how can you really only pay positive attention while raising your kids? Don’t you really have to notice all those awful things? And what about safety? That has to be a prime factor of parenting. Yes of course, only here’s the deal. When you give some positive energy to what you have been taught is negative it will no longer be negative. I had a six year old who had massive tantrums. I unquestionably HATED those tantrums. But rather than hold onto the negative, I focused on the fact that my child would always be free from perpetrators. She had a great set of lungs. I found opera music for her to sing along with. When she was seven her loud tantrums would often include a bit of operatic sounds. Now she is eight and rarely tantrums. But she knows about opera music. You can do the same with any negative. It’s not always getting rid of the behavior. It may be changing your opinion of the behavior or your reaction to it. Just remember to hold true to your values and morals. Have a great day parenting and living with Passion, Purpose, and Integrity, Grace

Parenting Power of Positive Energy

May 4, 2009 at 6:57 am | Posted in Motivational Monday, parents, Self Esteem | 2 Comments
Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

Here it is Motivational Monday
all over again.

We have been talking about peace and honor
and now I want to switch just slightly.

You see I am doing a workshop for teens this Wednesday
and the topic is

The Power of Positive Energy

Your attitude and perspective deeply affect
how you present yourself to the world.
A famous quote by Emerson reads:

“Enthusiasm is one of the most
powerful engines of success.

When you do a thing,
do it with all your might.
Put your whole soul into it.
Stamp it with your own personality.
Be active, be energetic,
be enthusiastic and faithful, and
you will accomplish your objective.

Nothing great was ever achieved
without enthusiasm.”

Learn that what you get back in life
has a direct correlation with what you give.
Discover how to develop and
use positive energy in your daily approach to life.

So of course I want to share a bit about how
you, as a parent, can use YOUR
Power of Positive Energy
to ease and calm your parenting.

Each time you hear yourself tell your child what
you don’t want, I want you to add on
what you do want.

Example: “You’re late!  Don’t miss that bus again.”
Add: “I want you to be timely and get on the bus.”

You can even shorten it to
“Be timely.  Get on the bus.”

This is about the most simple way to start the change
of shifting your negative energy to positive energy.

And let me tell, you if you are in a funk of negativity
this “simple” exercise can really undermine your
train of thought.

You are forced to stop that negative motion.
Its just like a train that gets derailed.
All that negativity just crashes.

It has nowhere to go.

When you take this tiny little step
not only will you change your energy from
negative to positive, you
will give your children something to
live up to.  Thus raising their self esteem.

That’s your Motivation for Monday.
And you can actually use this skill
absolutely anywhere.

Since I am a parent coach I urge you to try
at home with your kids first.

Please share your success stories.
It really inspires others when they
see that something really does work.

Now get on with parenting with
Passion, Purpose, and Integrity

Grace

PS:  If you haven’t checked out the
podcasts at GEM Parenting why not do it now?

http://www.GEMParenting.com/storehtm

Spiritual Counseling and Soul Healing Raises Your Self-Esteem

April 7, 2009 at 12:18 pm | Posted in 1 | Leave a comment
Tags: , , , , ,

Had an awesome interview with Maggie Ostara. She is a spiritual counselor and a soul healer. If you are in search of finding that deep peace that seems just out of your reach listen to this interview.

http://www.audioacrobat.com/play/WXrcn4B4

This is an opportunity to get into the depths of your spirit. What is spirit? Its the truest meaning of life. It is the God, universal, special, miraculous energy that each of has. Or we would not be alive.

How is your spirit today? What have you done to get in touch with your essence?

When you take the moments through your day that bring you to your spiritual self you bring peace, harmony, and equality to yourself and your family. You will raise your self esteem. Your confidence will soar. What you accomplish in a day will surprise you and everyone around you.

How is your spirit today? What have you done to get in touch with your essence? Let me know, you can inspire me and others.
(to leave a comment click the title of this article)

Motivational Monday-How Can You Bring Spirituality to Parenting?

April 6, 2009 at 10:11 am | Posted in 1 | 4 Comments
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Here we are in the midst of the hectic life of being a mother/father.  If you are like me, you have days filled with basic activites-teeth, hair, beds made, meals, meals, meals, meals, shopping, homework, driving to and from, hurt knees, hurt feelings, squabbling, and all that fills every minute of the day. Not to mention any of the other tasks and duties that are not directly related to parenting.

You have certainly heard find the time, get up early, stay up late, stop doing something so you can spend time being spiritual, make a routine of it.  And guess what happens?  Refer to paragraph one to know what happens if you aren’t sure.  Who are they kidding? We just can’t add spirituality in.  It is not essential or necessary.  It will be interrupted anyway so why try?

Why try?  Who cares?  I do. You do.  We need to find this thing called spirituality.  We need to be able to find that peace and harmony.  With spitituality we can have our self esteem, our energy, our freedom to be our best selves.

So how find this elusive thing called spirituality?

Start with taking five seconds at a time.  You can definately find this much time!  There really is no excuse for this short moment.

In the five seconds you can

  • give thanks,
  • offer courage,
  • feel connected,
  • feel humility,
  • know the universal energy is with you.

With your hands you can bring them together in prayer touching first your thumbs, and along to your pinkies.  Or you can use arm these vairations.  All have straight arms, the palms spread wide twtiching your fingers as you go through the five spiritual parts.  You can have them at your sides, .  You can twist at the waist.  You can reach to the sky.  You can raise your arms up and down at your sides or in front of you-being sure that as you go up your hands are facing up and as you go dowm your hands are facing down.

Your motivation for this week is to find these five seconds.  Let yourself find a few of them every day.  Be clear that this is your five seconds of spirituality.  And let others know how you are doing, what other ways you have of bringing spirituality into your life.  To comment simply click the title of this article and put your thoughts down.  They the ability to inpsire so many.

Are You Thoughtful Enough to Raise Your Children with High Self Esteem?

February 5, 2009 at 7:25 am | Posted in attitudes, children, Self Esteem, Thoughtful Thursday | 9 Comments
Tags: , , , , , ,

Today is Thoughtful Thursday.  Are you actually being thoughtful enough to be raising your kids with high self esteem?

I don’t want to get you confused and stressed, but most parents who are trying to bring high self-esteem into their houses are actually bringing in something that has no resemblance to self-esteem.

Most parents are teaching their children to compete against an external standard. Rather than help their children achieve their personal best, they are actually measuring them against a standard set out by some collective social norm.

How can you tell the difference?

Be thoughtful of the way yourself think about success, achievement, and acceptable completion of projects.

If you pay attention to how your child starts and how your child finishes, what the process is your child is using, rather than have any notion that there is a standard, that it is necessary to compare, then you are bringing in high self-esteem.

But if you are like most parents who compare your kids to any other kids, even with your own kids, you could be sabotaging your kids self-esteem.

Maybe it is no big deal to you, but it should be. I have seen way too many children who have seem to have fine self-esteem as kids crash as teens or adults.

They do not have an inner strength to be able to withstand the outside social pressures.

Have a Thursday filled with thought,

Grace

PS:  Are you holding back because of your own lack of self-esteem?  Seems to me you shouldn’t really want to repeat the pattern.

New Years Resolutions With Your Family

December 29, 2008 at 3:14 am | Posted in 1 | 3 Comments
Tags: , ,

Its Motivational Monday and Christmas is over
And of course New Years is approaching.

There are many theories about New Years resolutions. The mere thought of them can cause some people to sweat. Others try to ignore these ways of showing your shortcomings. And still others try to set up Resolutions, but they then leave them with some other lost pile of junk- if not in reality at least in their mind.

You may well be in one of these categories. And it is true-what good is a resolution if it will only causes you stress and reinforces your feelings of overwhelm? Not any at as far as I am concerned.

Only…

I am an avid believer in New Years Resolutions.
On New Years Day my family sits around and each person writes their single or multiple New Years Resolution down. (Of course if they can’t write they can dictate.)
We look at these resolutions as simple, fun ways to improve our living. I do guide my children when they choose or word something so it will not be difficult, overwhelming, or stress inducing. I think of these moments as ways of helping my children to learn to evaluate, not judge, themselves. Look for something they want to improve about themselves, yet not get bogged down in it.

My family has been doing this forever. And there isn’t a resolution that hasn’t been accomplished. As we go along for the next few months I will help the kids with ways of making their changes. And when they fall back into old patterns I am gentle, but firm that this is the behavior they decided to change. I ask them how they want to handle this time. I let them know that change is hard. We all have tough times changing. And when they are able to actually make a slight change I am sure to let them know I noticed. I do not give false praise. I may be super simple. “I see you were able to not yell at your sister at dinner.” I keep it a fact. It is not some way that they win favors, either in attention, bribes, or rewards. They cannot manipulate me by doing the corrected behavior. What they get is a true understanding of internal self-satisfaction.

As the year passes I make a point of stating months away-in June, Sept and especially Dec, the progress they have made. At any point when a sibling tries to induce the unwanted behavior, I guide the sibling to understanding that they are for support of the difficult changes. Most times the sibling backs off. But they are only human and of course have some innate need to squabble.

Right now we are beginning to think about what we will resolve to do in 2009.

Anyway, I love New Years Resolutions. Would love to have them be as fun and useful in your house as they are in mine.

For you to get a much clearer understanding of how to apply these resolutions to your family check out:

GEM Parenting Secrets Presents: New Years With a Twist of High Self-Esteem Podcast

You can find it at
http://www.gemparenting.com/store.htm

about two thirds of the way down.

Now start your New Year with
Passion, Purpose, and Integrity

Grace

Next Page »

Blog at WordPress.com.
Entries and comments feeds.