Motivational Monday: What is Natural Self-Esteem? A Short Overview

June 4, 2008 at 1:53 am | Posted in 1, attitudes, children, Creative Crayon Club, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, How To, moms, Mothers, Motivational Monday, parents, peer pressure, relationships, respect, responsibilities, Safety, Self Esteem, teenagers, teens, Thoughtful Thursday, toddlers, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | 2 Comments
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Welcome to GEM Parenting.

We just finished Teenager Month.

But don’t worry, if you missed the month just go to http://www.GEMParenting.com to find everything you missed.

Thanks to those of you who answered the survey.  I learned some practical and useful things from you.  And will be implementing your ideas in the near future. “What is Positive Intervention and how to implement it?” and ” What is real time out and how does it work” are the two teleclasses you want the most. The least desired was “Outdoor fun and safety.”  This is too bad for me because I love this topic.  Instead we will have “Fool Proof Net Safety” 

I will be sending information with the subject line: Parents of Teens – So only open if you are one – about a teleclass especially for you.  (You have to be a Pearl Member to get the discount. To join this complimentary membership click on Pearl Membership on our website at http://www.GEMParenting.com).  

But what I learned more than anything was that very few people actually understand what GEM Parenting is REALLY about. 

Although we do give good sound advice about parenting, asking in experts for GEM Parenting Secrets, giving you referrals to books and programs we think are valuable, having teleclasses and podcasts, our real secret is that everything we do is to help you understand how to raise your children with natural high self esteem. 

Surprisingly to me, many people don’t understand what the real value of doing everything you can to ensure your child has natural high self-esteem. 

Everything from your child’s attitude, morals and values, health, ability to succeed, desire to achieve, even life span, are directly effected by self-esteem.

I will be discussing the issues connected with natural high self-esteem through this newsletter over the next few weeks in lieu of GEM Parenting Secrets Teleclasses.

Does your child have low self-esteem?  Do you know the difference between raising high self-esteem and boosting ego?  Do you have any idea how to energize your child’s self-esteem?  Do you know how to use positive intervention and eliminate negative discipline?  Do you know that raising your child with high self-esteem will ease your life as well?  Your stress and anxieties will vanish as your child’s self-esteem soars.  Your child will be able to participate and engage in life on a level that is void of self-doubt and insecurities-for life.

The first tip you need to know is that the process is the most important aspect of your child’s life.  It is not the product that s/he produces.  The product is irrelevant if the process is not your child’s. 

Think back to your own childhood.  Everything you did was not about the product.  When you were a kid you wanted to get muddy, make something, eat your ice cream just the way you wanted (and maybe that meant getting it all over your face and down your front.) 

You may have been allowed to grow up this way, but my guess is that your parents were more concerned about the product-how neat you were, how accomplished you were, what grades you got- rather than the process of getting to being neat, getting to being accomplished, being educated regardless of good grades.  And if you did not live up to the desired product level, you were made to feel bad in one way or another.

And this is why parenting for you is such a struggle.

You would not have come to GEM Parenting (or any other site) if you were not struggling with parenting.  And I believe the bottom line of raising children is to ensure you create, instill, and maintain high self-esteem in your children.

Does your parenting style ensure you are raising your child with high self-esteem?  Please share its time we had some lively responses.  With over three thousand visitors someone has got to have something to say!

Tickle me Tuesday

One thing people have asked me to do is write a bit about some personal incidences-both about me, and people I have worked with.  So, I will venture out here.  Check out last Saturday’s post for the first one.

We will also have a book we recommend.  Only need to go to GEM Parenting to find out what it is.

Wednesday Wisdom

This Wednesday you are going to get the first installation of the real heart and soul of GEM Parenting.  An article you can get some real value from.

Thoughtful Thursday

Another slice of what it is like to be mom with high self-esteem raising kids with high self-esteem.

Follow Up Friday

 This is when you get to ask your questions.  And I am put on the spot to come up with answers to help you.  Of course some people sort of cheat and send their questions in ahead of time- I honor the first to come in by answering it first.

And how, when, and where does this happen?

How– It’s simple-blog talk radio.

You can listen, call in your question, or type into the chat session.

When– Friday at 9:30

Wherehttp://www.blogtalkradio.com/gemparenting

And of course Saturday is

Creative Crayon Club

My favorite day of the week!  I will give you fun, simple, and inexpensive activities to do with your children.  You know, good old fashioned family fun.

Enjoy your week!

 

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Motivational Monday: Teens and Lying

May 26, 2008 at 8:04 am | Posted in attitudes, children, Creative Crayon Club, dads, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, How To, marriage, moms, Mothers, Motivational Monday, parents, peer pressure, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, teens, Thoughtful Thursday, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | Leave a comment
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Welcome to GEM Parenting

We are finishing Teenager Month.  But don’t worry, if you missed the rest of the month just go to http://www.GEMParenting.com to find everything you missed.

Today we begin to talk about teens and lying.  These two, unfortunately often go hand in hand.  You are not the only one who has a teen that lies, but you don’t have to be a parent of teen who lies.  You can free both yourself and your teen from the need to lie.  This does not mean your teen will be perfect.  It means your teen will respect you and him/herself enough to be honest and mature about actions.  Rather than wondering and hoping your teen will not lie why not join us for our discussions on how to give your teen the real freedom and maturity to be honest.

When you give this respect to your teen just watch their self esteem soar.  It is amazing and wonderful to watch.  And believe it or not what your teen was doing that they lied about will begin to fade out of the picture.

My motivation to you today is:  Respect yourself and be honest with your teen.  See what happens.  Add a comment on the forum discussion.

Terrific Tuesday 

Today, we will have an article from a leading expert on Teens & Lying.  Our expert will share facts and thoughts on how we, as parents, can eliminate teen lying while respecting our teen’s creativity.  Be sure to check back tomorrow, you will be glad you did.

Wednesday Wisdom

On Wednesday we will have plenty for you to do.  In the morning, come check out my article on teens and lying.  It will give you some good sound answers.  Add to that GEM Parenting Secrets in the evening when I will be interviewing a special guest.  And add to that the last week of Taming the Teenager podcast is available.  You can only end up with a bit of wisdom from all this.

Learn how to stop teen lying and even why it occurs by joining us in a teleclass this Wednesday at 8:30pm EDT, 7:30 CDT, 5:30 PDT.  And you can be anywhere with a phone, so you don’t need to worry about what to wear or worry about much.  A teleclass is simply a seminar done by phone.

Thoughtful Thursday

Now if you simply can’t make the live teleclass, we will have the podcast available for you on Thursday.  And if you are unsure of what a podcast is, it is a recording that you can down load to your computer or mp3 player.  This means you can listen to it at your leisure-while sweating away at the gym, taking a calm walk, driving wherever you go, or curled up in your jammies with a cup of relaxing tea.  And you do not actually have to listen to on Thursday.  This is the day we release it. 

So if you are attending Mark Todhunter’s Tame Your Teenager Series then this is the perfect option for you.  Stay with Mark on Wednesday, and get the podcast Thursday to learn how to stop teen lying.

Follow Up Friday

This is when you get to ask your questions.  And I am put on the spot to come up with answers to help you.  Of course some people sort of cheat and send their questions in ahead of time- I honor the first to come in by answering it first.  And how, when, and where does this happen?

How- It’s simple-blog talk radio.  You can listen, call in your question, or type into the chat session.

When- Friday at 12:30

Where- http://www.blogtalkradio.com/gemparenting

And of course Saturday is…

 Creative Crayon Club           

This is still my favorite day of the week.  One last shot at helping you get new ideas of how to turn a recalcitrant teenager into a teen with ambition, honest values, and high morals.  Yet is still a kid at heart, has problems, has a wavering -by the minute- self esteem.

If you have teen problems then we are ready to teach you how to reduce and eliminate them.

 

Creative Crayon Club: Parties and Gatherings for Teens

May 23, 2008 at 8:45 pm | Posted in 1, attitudes, children, Creative Crayon Club, dads, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, How To, moms, Mothers, parents, peer pressure, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, teenagers, teens, Tweens, Welcome | Leave a comment
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 Creative Crayon Club

 

 

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This week we will give you some party ideas to have one of those fun safe parties every teen craves 

1. Costume Party

What you need: 

  • A great theme 
  • An appropriate space for the guests Invitations 
  • Music  Supplies for the theme 
  • Lots of Food 

What you do:

Think of a great theme for a costume party with your teen.  Make sure it is something hip and cool so that the teenagers can be creative and still dress appropriately.  A great idea is to be pop stars and then have a fun goofy singing contest during the party (try to get a mic set up).  Make a list and have your teen pass out invitations.  Make a supply list and go with your teen to buy everything.  Make sure to have plenty of food, some cool decorations, and everything everything goes along with the theme!  Activities are good too! 

2. Outdoor Bar-B-Que

What you need: 

  • A nice outdoor space, preferably with water and/or a big field 
  • A grill, table, and some food- make sure to have hamburgers, turkey burgers and veggie burgers, as well as chips and salsa, veggies and dip, etc. to cater to a wide variety of tastes, because teenagers are constantly changing and expressing themselves through outlets such
    as their food choices. 
  • Supplies for activities such as: music, a canoe (if you are near water), soccer ball, foosball equipment, a kickball, frisbee, volleyball, and hammocks are always nice. 

What you do: 

Choose the time and place for the party and pass out invitations.    Think of some activities that the teenagers can do during the party.  Teenagers are constantly on the go, so as many physical activities as possible! Teens love pool parties, so if you have access to one, use it… if you are by a body of water, go swimming and have a canoe or kayak on hand.  Teens love physical challenges like setting up a tight rope, relay races, or tetherball, also have an array of sports options for them to choose between such as soccer, kickball, foosball, frisbee, football, basketball (if you have a hoop), and even break out the old trampoline!

Make sure to have plenty of BBQ food – burgers, snacks, ice tea and lemonade, fruits, veggies, and don’t forget the cookies and ice cream!  Feel free to be creative in you dishes… 

3. Scavenger Hunt/ Murder Mystery 

What you need: 

  • A Murder Mystery Game or Scavenger Hunt: Usually these are bought all planned out, but if you are feeling extracreative you can do it yourself! 
  • Very cool/classy invitations for your teen to pass out. 
  • Costumes and props are essential. 
  • Music is always good. 

What you do: 

Spend some quality time with your teen planning the party.  These types of things have to be planned very precisely, so this becomes one of the most fun parts of the process.    Pass out the invites and set up for the party (make the list and go shopping together).  Make sure to get some decorations to go along with the theme, and feel free to dress up too!  Give yourself a role as the uninvolved overseer of the building the mystery takes place, or the overseer of the scavenger hunt ‘just making sure they are getting along ok’ so you can be involved in the party without being involved in the actual game. 

Have fun!  and of course … no teen party is complete without a dance-off and/or limbo contest and a lot of food!!!

These party ideas came directly from my eldest daughter.  They are parties we either had or she attended.  And I want to let you know-  She balked at the idea of these parties, her friends loved them.  And by giving her the respect to have a real party, not just a stand around and be stupid party, her self esteem soared.  People still talk about the great parties she had.  So go for fun, be cool, give respect and get respect back. 

Grace E Mauzy, MA
Parent Coach
Helping parents instill high self esteem in their children

http://www.GEMParenting.com
Making families stronger through high self esteem

http://www.GEMParenting.wordpress.com
If you are lost in your parenting journey you should be
coming to the blog to find your way.

Wisdom Wednesday: Prom Problems and Teen Social Gatherings

May 21, 2008 at 7:54 am | Posted in 1, attitudes, children, dads, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, How To, marriage, moms, Mothers, parents, peer pressure, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, teenagers, teens, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | 1 Comment
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Prom Problems and Teen Social Gatherings

Teen gatherings have always been one of those problems that parents have a hard time dealing with.  How do you allow teens to gather, keep everyone safe and legal, as a parent not being part of the party, and still know what is going on and be responsible for what is happening at your house?  And what do you do when your teen is going someplace else?  Is there any way to guide without clipping your teen’s wings?

That is some tall order, especially now with the Internet adding to the mixture.  First, I want to share some ideas to help you that are tried and true.  Then we will touch on how to incorporate them into wireless communications. 

When teens gather they want to be independent, yet they are either not of legal age or mature enough to be totally in control of their gatherings.  Rather than let your teen just simply have a gathering, start with guidelines, hard and solid rules, and talk about issues that might come up.

You as the parent pick the rules.  Ask your teen if there are any that he/she wants to add.  Sometimes they do surprise you.  Here are a number of rules to pick from.  You do not need to have all the rules for every party.  But it is good to have the list in front of you when you are discussing your own rules.  This way it is not just you, the dumb parent, who is laying down the law.

  • Nothing illegal at the party. Abusers will be asked to leave.
  • An invitation list with a maximum number of guests. To be determined, written on a hard copy (that means printed or written out), a specified number of hours before the party begins- I suggest 24 hours.
  • Only guests on the invitation list. Party bashers will be asked to leave.
  • A beginning and ending time of the party.
  • Backpacks and other carry-ins to be placed in public space.
  • Parents will NOT participate in party unless requested by own teen.
  • Parents will interact/be around and visible during party.

With these as hard rules, you can have guidelines that bring the teens to be responsible for having their party be one of distinction and finesse, as well as be all-out fun and awesome.  Let your teen choose a partner who is both reliable and responsible to help plan the party.  Have real paper invitations.  This is of course more work, but this does mean that your teen actually invites who he/she wants to.  These can be quick copies from your home printer, passed out by hand.  Have your teen put the individuals’ names on the invitations.  You can have a theme party.  And I can tell you from personal experience, your teen will balk and cry and just walk away at the idea.  But when you actually have the party, everyone will have a blast. 

Guide your teen to understand that having a large group is both a privilege and a responsibility and the responsibility is all on your teen’s shoulders.  But now in most states it is also the parents’ responsibility.  Let your teen know this fact; there are many states and towns that hold the adult legally responsible for what happens on their property.

As I mentioned, there is the issue of the Internet now.  Let your teen understand that gatherings at your house, even if shared through the Internet, are going to be set in hard copy.  The Internet is a tool to communicate, but it does not have to be a tool to have your house trampled by hundreds of teens.  Be aware- there are regular confirmed reports of teen parties with Internet invitations that have five hundred or more teens show up!

And through all this you, as the parent, can have fun.  Relax and enjoy the good friends your teen has.  Remember, soon your teen will be an adult and have these parties completely on their own.  This is your chance to help them understand why and how to have a good time, yet stay within personal boundaries.

 

Grace E. Mauzy, MA works with overwhelmed, stressed parents having difficulty comfortably cope with parenting. Parents learn positive intervention utilizing strategies and tactics to develop high self-esteem in children. Grace is the founder of GEM Parenting – an online community dedicated to parenting with passion, purpose, and integrity. (GEMParenting.com) Through Grace’s professional and personal life experiences, she has a unique ability to understand and empower parents to implement new parenting styles, allowing them to challenge themselves to break free of their destructive behaviors and attitudes.  And raise their children with confidence, peace, and harmony.  To learn more about her powerful speaking, coaching, and workshops, or to receive Grace’s motivating audio course “The 7 Deadly Mistakes Parents Make That Create Spoiled Brats – And How You Can Avoid Them!” visit http://www.7deadlymistakesparentsmake.com or visit http://www.GEMParenting.com.

Terrific Tuesday: Prom Problems and Teenage Social Gatherings

May 19, 2008 at 11:10 pm | Posted in attitudes, children, dads, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, How To, marriage, moms, Mothers, parents, peer pressure, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, teenagers, teens, Tweens, Welcome | Leave a comment
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GEM Parenting Presents: Prom Problems and Issues of Teen Gatherings

Set Your Calendar
Live with Grace Teleclass

Wed., May 21, 2008
8:30 p.m. E.S.T.
Length: one hour

Featuring Grace E. Mauzy, M.A., and a special Guest Expert
Educational ~ Motivating ~ Interactive

We will be discussing: How the six main dilemmas facing parents of teens are also the demons that demoralize teens and preteen – enticing them make inappropriate and negative life altering changes in social gatherings.

For only $6.00 you learn how to use positive intervention to help your teen develop and mature away from self-demoralizing and self-demeaning behaviors, and toward behaviors that will instill a wonderful sense of well being that is independent of all the demands on teens these days.

Join GEM Parenting Teleseminar

By registering for this teleclass, you will reserve your space on the call, receive special call-in information, and access to downloadable GEM Action Guide, Expert Article, and Grace’s Personal Article.

 

 

 

Motivational Monday: Prom Problems and Issues of Teen Gatherings

May 19, 2008 at 7:34 am | Posted in attitudes, children, Creative Crayon Club, dads, Families, Family Time, Focused Fridays, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, How To, moms, Mothers, Motivational Monday, parents, peer pressure, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, spirituality, teenagers, teens, Thoughtful Thursday, travel, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | Leave a comment
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Welcome to GEM Parenting

We are in the middle of Teenager Month.

This week we are going to be talking about Prom Problems and Issues of Teen Gatherings.  And the idea of Prom Problems can really be stretched to Teen gatherings.  So if you have already had your prom, but want to understand how to help your teen be part of teen gatherings, with the ability to be cool, but safe, then join us for the week.

Prom Problems and Issues of Teen Gatherings really begin when parents decide that it is somehow not their place to be involved with these private gatherings of teens. There is nothing further from the truth than that.  At this time in your teen’s life they need more interaction and guidance than any other time.  The tricky part is that when they were young you felt you could be in charge.  Now after all these years your teen understands what buttons to push and how to push them, and they are becoming independent.  So there is a slippery slide into giving up, worrying without action, looking the other way and hoping things will come out OK.

If you find you are at a loss as how to be part of your teens social life without being that oppressive over protective parent then I want you to stay with me all week.  Social gatherings can and often are the scariest part of being a teen-for both parent and teen.

When we talk this Wednesday evening at GEM Parenting Secrets I will take my motto, Every Child is a GEM, to help you understand how you can be involved yet not stifle your child.  In fact what we will talk about will actually give your teen the freedom to stretch and grow!!

If you have a teen you know that teen gatherings are such an important part of their life, yet they can cause severe and life long negative changes in your teen.  To join this teleclass please use this link and follow the instructions for registration in the yellow box on the top left. http://www.GEMParenting.com.

In this hour-long teleclass I will be discussing:

How the six main dilemmas facing parents of teens are also the demons that demoralize teens and preteens – enticing them make inappropriate and negative life altering changes in social gatherings

  1. Peer Pressure
  2. Media Influence and pressure
  3. Friends changing
  4. Education tracks
  5. Drugs/Sex/Alcohol/Shoplifting
  6. How to set limitations, guidelines, and still create more freedom

Rather than letting your teen just go forward into this unknown scary time where there is a great deal of manipulation and uncertainty, join with your teen to have a strong force that allows your kid to be cool, but safe and be able to make healthy decisions.

If you haven any desire to help your teen through social gatherings, better than you did, then this Wed evening’s GEM Parenting Secrets is for you. We will be looking at ways to use positive intervention to help your teen develop and mature away from self demoralizing and self demeaning behaviors and toward behaviors that will instill a wonderful sense of well being that is independent of all the demands on teens these days.

Hope you will be free to join us.

Terrific Tuesday

Come back to gain some wisdom from our expert guest.  Here at GEM Parenting we really like to share views and ideas from others. 

Wednesday Wisdom

We call this Wednesday Wisdom because this is the day you get the real GEM Parenting Wisdom.  In the morning you can come check out the article that I have written.  And in the evening you can come join us for Live With Grace- GEM Parenting Secrets.

As you can see we are going on from last week where we talked about My Teen Screwed Up In School, What do I do?

And incidentally, Tame Your Teenager is still going on, so to be sure to be part of both check out Thoughtful Thursday.

Again we are expecting a lively discussion – parents of teens can be quite expressive!  If you want your teen to be safe and mature then you have got to join us!  Don’t forget your own troubles.  Don’t make your teen go through years to undo what they did as a teen.

To have the opportunity to have your personal questions answered and elaborated upon you have got to join us.  If you don’t it is not our fault when things screw up AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN.  Find peace and stability for your family.  Join us.

This teleclass will be at 8:30pm eastern/5:30pm pacific.  You can register right now at http://www.GEMParenting.

I want to warn you, this will be filled with content, wisdom and inspiration.  We do have a nominal charge ($6 -it just helps with overhead) And you can be anywhere with a phone, so you don’t need to worry about what to wear or worry about much.  A teleclass is simply a seminar done by phone.

Thoughtful Thursday

Now if you simply can’t make the live teleseminar, we will have the podcast available for you on Thursday.  And if you are unsure of what a podcast is, it is a recording that you can down load to your computer or mp3 player.  This means you can listen to it at your leisure-while sweating away at the gym, taking a calm walk, driving wherever you go, or curled up in your jammies with a cup of relaxing tea.  And you do not actually have to listen to it on Thursday.  This is the day we release it. 

So if you are attending Mark Todhunter’s Tame Your Teenager Series then this is the perfect option for you.  Stay with Tom on Wed, and get the podcast “Prom Problems and Issues of Teen Gatherings” to build up your knowledge and parenting skills.

Feedback Friday

I have a Free radio show every Friday at 12:30 pm EDT (9:30 am PDT) You have got to come because I almost always have a few more thoughts I didn’t get in or new thoughts that came to me after I was done, and of course this is the day I do live Q&A.  Be sure your question is addresses- send in your question now.

And just to let you know, next week I am going to be talking about Teens and lying.  Know any teens that lie?  (Or should I say don’t lie?).  Send in those questions as well.

There is no better way for me to help you than for you to send me your questions and concerns.  And that is my number one goal-help you be a happy, relaxed, reliable and responsible parent.  So please take a moment and send me your question.

 

And of course Saturday is…

Creative Crayon Club

Here I am going to provide you with activities and ideas you can do with your teen.  These will not be how to talk about problems and issues, but how to DO things together, create things and play on a new level.  Your teen may have had social problems so it is your duty to find ways to help your teen be a GEM in another light.  On Saturday we will be sharing things to help you find new facets in your teen GEM.

Enjoy your week!

Creative Crayon Club: Spring Sports and Children’s Morals

May 2, 2008 at 11:05 pm | Posted in children, Creative Crayon Club, dads, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, How To, moms, Mothers, parents, Safety, Self Esteem, sports, teens, toddlers, Tweens, Welcome | Leave a comment
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Creative Crayon Club

This week take time to be unorganized with your child’s sport. If your child plays soccer be a little early for a practice and just kick the ball around for fun. Try going for a walk with a soccer ball that you and your child pass.

Don’t worry if you are not good. The point is to have fun.

Other fun slightly organized games for multiple ages and abilities:

Kick the Can

This is my own all time favorite and it is my family’s fave as well!

What you need:

And old coffee can

(Nowadays you should put duct tape around the top edge, but in my day we just kicked the can till it fell apart)

Space with hiding spots

Jail

Players- about 5 at least – 10 is a great number

What you do:

One person is the can kicker

One person is “It”

The others are hiders

It covers eyes.

Can kicker kicks can. Warn kicker to kick it away from It and other children

It counts to twenty (or appropriate number for your group)

Can kicker and other children hide during counting.

It gets can and puts it near jail.

It looks for children.

When It finds someone he/she yells his or her name and races for the can.

The found child races for the can as well.

If It gets to can first found child goes to jail.

If found child gets to can first, he/she kicks can-away from children/jail

and all children in jail go free.

It puts can back and starts again.

If one child is It for too long, then have a drink/snack break, rather than just switching things around.

Enjoy your weekend with the kids!

*Program Alert* Organized Sports and Children’s Morals

April 30, 2008 at 10:54 am | Posted in 1, children, dads, Families, Family Time, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, moms, parents, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, sports, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | Leave a comment
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Just a quick not to let you know that I am having a program on Organized Sports and Children’s Moral.

These days it is quite common for our children to be involved in sports-at least one a season.
And let me tell you, there are wonderful aspects of sports.

But there are also parts of these organized sports that simply cause despair and low self-esteem.

That is the side of spring sports we are going to deal with.

Right now, while you are in the thick of it. I am going to talk about:

  • How sports have developed and changed,
  • What benefits there are to organized sports, and most importantly,
  • What to do when your child is suffering from organized sports.

Join GEM Parenting Teleseminar

 

The program is presented by GEM Parenting Secrets.  It starts at tonight, 4/30/08 at 8:30 p.m. EST / 5:30 p.m. PST. When you join you will receive an action guide and an article along with the opportunity to ask your questions about children sports and moral.

Join GEM Parenting Teleseminar

 

Love to talk with you later today,


PS, I forgot to mention that I will have a special guest joining me.  Hope you can make it!

 

Wisdom Wednesday: Spring Sports and Good Moral

April 30, 2008 at 6:21 am | Posted in 1, children, dads, Families, Family Time, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, moms, Mothers, parents, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, siblings, sports, teens, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | 2 Comments
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Spring Sports and Moral

Sports are such a major part of our lives these days. Parents sign kids up months in advance. They take them to tryouts at younger and younger ages. The practices are anywhere from twice a week to every afternoon. And the competitions take at least one weekend day, with tournaments taking both days. Why in the world do we have our kids “free” time filled with sports? What is the draw? And the bottom line, is it healthy for our children’s self esteem? If it is not healthy, what do we do?

Human beings are by nature group-oriented. We live in societies. We engage in interactions with others. Human beings, also by nature, relish in being challenged, and part of all the stress we create for ourselves comes from this need of ours. Finally, children love to be active and physical and voila, sports for children seem to fit the bill perfectly.

However, why do we have sports for children when thirty years ago, sports played by children was predominantly part of school or ad-hoc empty field games? Why do we have tryouts for young children and organized sports now?

This change comes from some whole culture changes. In the past (50+ years), most children actually had lots of necessary physical activities. Walking was the main mode of transportation. Children would easily walk four to ten miles a day, just getting around without cars. Life was obviously structured without all the conveniences we have, thus physical activity just existed. There was no need to implant it in our lives.

The other major cultural change is electronic entertainment. Again in the past, children had to create their own entertainment. This was often a challenge. It took mental strength and ability. The most popular kids were not the ones with the gadgets, but the ones who had the best imaginations. You can still find these kids, but our media has taught us to look for gadget owners as being the ones to follow.

Our children now need to be entertained rather than create their own challenges. With these two major changes in our society, a huge hole was left for kids. They do not have enough physical activity and they look to be entertained rather than create and challenge themselves. These two cultural changes and our innate human tendencies to need physical activity and challenges makes children’s sports the perfect answer to accommodate our needs.

Given the perfect situation: parents, coaches, teammates, and child all filling roles with enthusiasm, respect, enough challenge, physical activity, freedom to create and play outside the actual regulated sport, then you will have a wonderful time with sports for your children. But perfection is not always the case and as children get older parts of the picture get skewed. That is when sports can and does diminish moral and self-esteem.

So what are your choices? Pull your kid out? Stick it out? Find another team? Make changes where you are? All of these have merit, except stick it out. To make changes first look to yourself. Ask yourself these questions: How am I contributing to the negative aspects of this sport? Check that you communicate respect, enthusiasm, and appropriate disappointment. Be sure to express yourself as your child’s advocate. Your next place to look is how the coach handles the team. If the coach is constantly belittling the players, having too many drills, treating young children as if they were teenagers, forcing players to feel guilty, then you need to talk with the coach. Rather than tell the coach how to be different, find an article, suggest a speaker for the team/parents/coaches. In other words don’t attack the coach. If you are unable to get any change with the coach find another team. If what is happening to your child is seriously detrimental, then pull your kid out right now.

When the parents as a whole are overly aggressive and demanding perfection from their kids, again get some articles that give new ideas, or get a speaker to come. Try not to challenge or attack these parents. Generally if you do, they will shut down to change. As the parent you have both the responsibility and the privilege to help your child grow into the most illuminating gem. Sports can and does bring out wonderful parts of our children. Use that side of sports to guide you in your path of youth sports.

Grace E. Mauzy, M.A.
Founder of GEM Parenting
http://www.GEMParenting.com
Copyright © 2008 ♥ GEM Parenting ♥ http://www.GEMParenting.com

Tickle Me Tuesday: Sports & Good Moral Teleseminar Tomorrow

April 29, 2008 at 6:35 am | Posted in 1, children, Creative Crayon Club, dads, Families, Family Time, Focused Fridays, Fun Activities, GEM Parenting Secrets, Health, moms, Motivational Monday, parents, relationships, Safety, Self Esteem, sports, teens, Thoughtful Thursday, Tweens, Wednesday Wisdom, Welcome | Leave a comment

GEM PARENTING SECRETS PRESENTS: Sports & Good Moral

Live with Grace Mauzy!

Set Your Calendar for this
Live Teleseminar

Date: Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Time: 8:30 p.m. Eastern/5:30 p.m. Pacific

I will be discussing how sports can and does have tremendous effect on your child’s self-esteem. We will look at strategies that will alleviate stress and bring the fun back to the sport. How to have sports increase your child’s self-esteem rather than leave your child torn and tattered after every game and practice.

For only $6.00 you can join this teleseminar and find out the best ways to decrease the negative impact of sports on your children, help them feel satisfied, desire to have fun, be challenged, and increase their self-esteem through sports. Have your children learn from sports how to take a difficult situation and turn it into a positive growing experience. Give both you and your children the courage and peace that comes with doing a job well done. And best of all you give your family the opportunity to develop high self-esteem and bring out the beautiful Gem that is within each member of your family.

Join GEM Parenting Teleseminar

 

 

As a registered participant, you will have the opportunity to ask your personal questions. Send them in advance of the teleseminar. You will benefit your family’s self-esteem, increase the joys of being in sports, and decrease the stress involved with having kids who love sports, but are being crushed by them.

Sign up today!
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