We Weren’t All Happy, We Weren’t All Satisfied, BUT We Were Determined

September 20, 2011 at 9:55 pm | Posted in ACL recovery, attitudes, Move to Park City Utah, Self Esteem | Leave a comment
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Saturday brought one new complication. Jeanee had a ramp competition in the afternoon, which Jamie had been planning on entering as well. Jamie was past hating her sister. But I really didn’t know if she was ready to face the place where she had her injury or watch the other athletes have so much fun in the competition; I knew she was able to support her sister.

I took Jeanee for precomp training and went back to the house. I announced very clearly and strongly. “I am going to watch Jeanee in the comp this afternoon. You can come with me or stay here. I WILL be going to see Jeanee no matter what you decide.”

Jamie didn’t answer with anything other than mumbled words. Of course it was a tough decision, and I knew why. But rather than voicing these, I left it for Jamie to sort out.

Fifteen minutes before it was time for me to go I went up to Jamie’s room. “I’m leaving in 15 minutes. You can come or stay it is up to you.”
“I don’t know if I can go.”
“Then stay here. I am leaving in 15 minutes.”

I left the room.

Ten minutes later I went back and told Jamie I was leaving.
“OK, I’ll go. I want to support Jeanee. I want to see her do some sick tricks! And besides if I stay here I may just hurt myself”

I told Jamie that I thought it was braver to go than to stay home.
“How can it be braver. If I stay here I may do something terrible.”
“Anyone can hurt themselves in private. It’s going out in public, to the place where you long to be, seeing people do exactly what you wish you could be doing that takes much more strength.
“You’re crazy. But I’m going anyway.”

When we arrived at the Utah Olympic Park Jamie had real second thoughts. But we were exactly on time for the comp. There was no going back. I wasn’t going to miss Jeanee to take Jamie home because she chickened out.

I told Jamie, “You can get out of the car now, or wait in the car. The choice is yours.”

She got out of the car. We got ourselves on the some grass near the athletes. I held Jamie’s leg up to keep the swelling down. Lots of people came over to say hi. After Jeanee’s first jump- which was great by the way- Jamie had to go to the bathroom. She decided to go on deck, where the athletes were.

I knew at that moment Jamie had passed from the depressed, desolate, injured athlete to the injured, coming back, dynamic Jamie that finds the way to do whatever comes in her path with energy, style, gusto, and as full of life as there is to live.

She spent the next hour talking with athletes and coaches, all smiles.

Jeanee came in second for her age group. We left a different family.

We weren’t all happy, we weren’t all satisfied with the turn of events, but we were determined to get past this, to make the best of it, and most importantly love and support each other no matter what circumstances got in the way.

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