How Girls Still Hold Back In Sports?

December 3, 2010 at 3:08 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
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From the Women’s Sports Foundation- It’s not very often that you see boys storming the court in celebration of a girl’s basketball win. Watch what happens when an amazing buzzer-beater shot is made and the age-old boys’ sports versus girls’ sports argument is quickly forgotten. We are loving this!

One of the things that gets me is that there is still plenty who think boys sports are more interesting, dynamic, action oriented than girls sports. What do you think?

I spend tons of time watching girls’ sports. And tons of time watching coed sports, but not all that much time watching all boy sports. And here’s the thing. I really find the excitement and level of action in the all girls’ sports to be equal to what happens with the coed sports.

I don’ t know about you, but when I watch my daughters’ teams I am very involved. I get very excited. And I know there is plenty of action. The girls’ teams are aggressive, excited, and ready to play with all their might. They play to win. Have you ever seen a girl’s team head out to have a “goody two shoes” time? And really and truly not care I f they win or loose? I haven’t.

I think one real difference is the attitude of our society. We have these underlying ideas and thoughts that girl’s sports are more subdued. That girls just are really less aggressive than boys. That girls aren’t strong enough to make it interesting.

Well- I’ll tell you one thing for sure. That is totally full of crap. Out of all my daughters, their friends (both boys and girls), I have never seen the girls sit back and let the game happen around them. They are totally involved. And the girls are doing just amazing things to be strong. Have you been to training for girls or coed teams lately? All I can say is that it’s about equal or maybe even tilted to the girl’s side for fitness training. These girls are STRONG nowadays.

But what about aggression? Where do the girls stand with aggression? I have to say that I see the girls hold back here. And no wonder. I’ve worked with kids (boys and girls) from two up and their parents on all kids of behavioral and life situations. – Remember I was an ordinary pre-school teacher, so it’s not about kids with issues.

It’s important that you heard (read) me say that I think girls hold back with aggression. Here’s the thing, from the time girls are two they are taught by just about every socializing environment that exists to hold back aggressively. Yet boys are expected, permitted, encouraged to be aggressive.

Aggressive is not only about hurting or punching someone else. It’s also used to characterize someone who exhibits determination, energy, and initiative. (Encarta World English Dictionary) Unfortunately, this second part of being aggressive gets held back in girls, as well as holding back the readiness and tendency to attack or do harm to others.

You know- Girls don’t do that.

I have seen hundreds of boys be aggressive in the do harm to others way. They do get reprimanded, but there is still this belief that their behavior is just what boys do- and eventually they will grow out of it.

But when a girl has that kind of aggressive action people respond completely differently. It’s a fit. It’s horrible. It’s absolutely not accepted. I know when Jilly attacked her sister -in public no less- two weeks ago, everyone was horrified. They really couldn’t decide how to react. I asked myself, “If this were two boys what would anyone do?”

Well there would be some reprimanding, but not too much. It would just be shrugged off. And of course everyone would have thought that Jamie deserved it anyway. It’s brothers fighting the way brothers fight.

But the problem is that since there are two kinds of aggression they are linked. And by holding the girls back I one form of aggression they are held back in the other.

I’m not advocating to set girls up to be attacking and aggressive. I’m thinking maybe girls need to be expected to be attacking aggressive the same as boys.

I know its way off for me, cause I really hate attacking aggressive, but maybe if we equaled out that part of bringing up boys and girls then when they lived their lives the girls would have the same aggressive determination, energy and initiative as boys in sports.

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