What Are You Putting at Stake For Your Reputation as a Parent?

June 17, 2009 at 1:27 pm | Posted in 1 | 2 Comments
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Monday I talked about your reputation. I talked about how you need to prod yourself to take action.

Putting your reputation at stake is key as a parent.  You have everything to lose and everything to live by.

It you put your reputation on the line with just a bit of energy, then you will live with just a bit of a reputation- good or bad.  But if you are resisting or fearful of the whole wonderful and fulfilling life as a parent you dream of then you will simply procrastinate till your kids are grown.  I promise it happens quicker than anyone ever tells you!

You really need to put your whole life at stake. And I’m not
talking about human sacrifice here! I’m talking about what’s most
important to you, what’s at your very heart.

If you are parenting just to get by, or even just to be
successful, you really don’t have a lot at stake. After all, what’s
the big deal if your kid isn’t that successful? You can let
things slip by for a week or a month. They’ll grow up sooner or later.

You can really have two things at stake. One is external (like the
car) and the other is internal. Let’s talk about external first.

If you have a mortgage to pay, kids to support and a “nut” to
make every month, that’s what you have at stake externally. And
this isn’t trivial.

I have a great life.  I live in NH for ten months- in the White Mountains National Forest-
I live in CT for the summer, near the beach and my mother. My children are all doing exactly what they want.  And I love my life.

But even this has its limitations.

After all, it can soon feel like you’re in the rat race, keeping up
with the Jones’s and never feeling you’re giving and doing quite enough.
Sure, you have something at stake, but it’s easy to wonder if all
the hard work is really worth it.

Perhaps then you discover that you need to put something
internal at stake. Now this can be a dead end, too. Chasing
happiness and fulfillment can be elusive. After all, how happy is

My discovery, the thing that ultimately gets me up in the
morning, is making a difference, making a contribution. When
you put this at stake, everything seems to change. When your
focus is the welfare of others, you win every single time.

Now as moms it seems that’s all that we are doing, but there is a real difference.
Here it is.  If you are going through making a contribution to your kids life as a duty, as  a forced activity, as a drudgery, you will not be happy to say the least!

What ever I do- write this blog, give a talk, help a client, more importantly look at what my child has made, help with their lessons, drive them to wherever, do their laundry and dishes, and kiss they goodnight – I do it to make a difference.  It comes from my heart.

Mothers and families who base their lives on this principle thrive.  Families that don’t?  The stories are endless about them.

So the thing to put at stake every day is the contribution you
make. “Today I’ll run my home, raise my kids, live my life to
make a contribution. What’s wanted and needed right now where
can I best make that contribution?”

Its important to remember that the magnificence of what you do is directly connected with the love and heart felt energy you put into anything.  It is not about how others think you have done, how much money is involved, or how successful you are.

If you get to that place, then procrastination, delay, fears and
worries won’t have such a big part in your life. You’ll join that
support group; you’ll get your house chores done; you’ll really stop and look at the picture your child made; you’ll go the extra mile.

What are you going to put at stake?

By the way, it’s also important to make a contribution to yourself
as well.

What’s something bigger than yourself that you’ll put at stake?
Please share your comments

And for your reputation
Parent with Passion, Purpose, and Integrity,


PS: Ready to talk with others about how to really live your life as the parent with a true and fantastic reputation? Join me at 7 pm EDT, 6 CDT, 4 PDT. Just lick this link (or cut and paste) to get the details.


I am really psyched to have you join!


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