You Scream, They Scream, We all Scream for Not Ice Cream

October 14, 2008 at 12:37 pm | Posted in children, dads, Families, moms, Mothers, parents, Self Esteem, Terrific Tuesday | Leave a comment
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Hi its Terrific Tuesday.  Get a handle on how to get a bit of love back into your parenting.

Your problem is you know that you are supposed to love your children.  And now you have Grace pointing out that you may in your heart love them, but you know you are not loving them in action.  You are hating them, or mothering, or just plain life.  

Today take a five minute break from your hating.  Get a picture you love of your children.   One that only brings pleasure, peace, joy, and happiness to you.  It must be a strong feeling.  Just look at the picture for five minutes.  Feel the love.  Let it envelope you.  Try it on as a scarf around your neck, a shawl draping over your shoulders.  Let the love be yours for these five minutes.

When the time is up, go back to what you were doing.  And when you are hearing your children scream, when you are shouting back, block out what you are actually seeing.  Have a little hallucination of the picture you were looking at.  This will give you just a speck of time to regroup and try to talk with a bit of love in your feelings.

When you talk with love this does not mean giving in.  You can be very firm with love.  You can be understanding.  Yet you are the parent and can love your children to good behavior.  

When they are demanding, bratty, spoiled, unruly give them limits.  Speak over and over this phrase, “I understand that you don’t want to and that’s OK.”  Say it, say it, say it.  You can’t say it too much.  

Now go get your picture, lock yourself in the bathroom with it and feel the love for five minutes.  And for the rest of the day remember to say, “I understand that you don’t want to and that’s OK.”

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